3 things that make prioritizing hard with an ADHD

I sat down to work today and felt completely at a loss. I knew I had TONS of things to do but didn't know where to start. So what did I do?

Grabbed my phone and tapped on that siren call of social media, of course.

A fly on the wall would have chuckled as it watched me, the ADHD specialist, procrastinate with full force. Until I finally shook my head strongly and said to myself (out loud, I might add), "Okay, Marce- you have a lot to do, and none of it’s on social media- let's get to work."

I was feeling overwhelmed. I knew that I had more to do than time to do it, and it was causing paralysis.

Who’s with me on this?!?

We have a list of things we know we need to do. Add this to the list of things that we have forgotten we needed to do, and it all feels big and scary, so we avoid.

Because it's hard. It's hard to figure out what, in the swarm of "shoulds" and "oughts" and "want to’s" is the most important to do right now. Particularly with an ADHD brain, which has 3 unique qualities which make it extra difficult to hone in on the top priorities.

The Top 3 things that make prioritizing hard for ADHD brains

Time Myopia

The ADHD brain has a tough time seeing into the future. It's as if it’s at sea and it’s looking out at the horizon. Deadlines are boats on that horizon. But an ADHD brain is nearsighted (it has time myopia) and it can feel and see the boats once they get closer. So the paper due tomorrow or the email that needs to go out in an hour- it feels those things- but, the multistep project due at the end of the month- those feel so far off, it can't see it.

The Big Picture Brain

One of the most beautiful things about the ADHD brain is its big-picture ability. It can see so much and in so much detail. This leads to really creative problem-solving, but it can also cause decision paralysis. Sometimes this big-picture brain sees so much that it has a hard time deciding what is most important because it gets swamped by all the possibilities.

Love of all things Shiny and New

I've talked a lot about how the ADHD brain is motivated by novelty. New, shiny things are so appealing that an ADHD brain becomes a moth to a flame- getting drawn in over and over to that new thing regardless of its importance, relevance, or significance. This wreaks havoc on a task list and makes it feel close to impossible for the ADHD brain to not to jump in headfirst into whatever task feels the shiniest at the moment.

The Mindset Shifts that can Unlock your ability to Prioritize

It can be tempting to turn away from the struggle of prioritizing, feeling like your brain just isn't wired for it. But that leaves you continually responding: putting out one fire after another, always wishing you had time to do the other things but never finding it. Challenging these thoughts and beliefs that keep you stuck in this cycle is the first step toward unlocking the freedom that prioritizing gives you.

So let's examine 3 essential truths of prioritizing:

Truth #1: You can't do it all

Your brain may see big beautiful pictures and be able to take in details from all around and when you are hyperfocused, you may be able to accomplish more than 3 neurotypicals. You may feel passionate about every task. But you still can’t do it all. Your brain gets excited- really, really excited. And, believe me- as a (kind of) neurotypical- that is one of the things about the ADHD brain I admire most. But, even all that energy isn’t enough to tackle it all. So prioritizing is mandatory. Figuring out what;’s going to get you where you want to go and letting go of the rest- that’s what’s going to move you in the right direction and give you some peace.

Truth #2: Spending time gives you time

Taking the time to prioritize when you feel overwhelmed can feel like a ridiculous prospect. Why spend time doing something that isn't "on fire"? Because spending the time to organize your tasks (particularly at the beginning when you have some executive functioning energy to spare) is what will allow you to let go of the stress and anxiety about what to do and when. This anxiety causes paralysis, avoidance, and procrastination. So, time spent prioritizing frees you from that and buys you time later on.

Truth #3: The fact that it’s hard makes it that much more important to do

We like to avoid hard things. It challenges our sense of our selves as competent, capable adults. But you know what? That's actually not true. The fact that something is hard means that it’s something that you can learn. It means that you get the chance to practice it and, with time, build up the capacity. This pattern of struggling with something, trying it over and over, and then finding some mastery- that’s what gives you the sense of- I can do anything. And just think of all you can accomplish if you felt that about yourself?!?

Ready to do that hard thing and get those priorities straight? Check out Getting the Right Stuff Done: The Ultimate 5-step process for prioritizing.

What beliefs about prioritizing do you hold? How are they holding you back, and how can you challenge them?

Ready to shift from
meltdown to mastery?

This online course has been designed specifically to help teach the strategies ADHD brains need to help them move from overwhelm and meltdowns to confident emotional mastery.

View Course